You Never Know
by Hawkeyeisms
Summary: Set after the events of ME2. Can Shepard and Kaidan fix their relationship after the events on Horizon? What about the Reapers?
1. Chapter 1

_BioWare owns the Mass Effect universe…unfortunately._

_This is my first Fan Fic in about a year. Comments and advice are quite loved. I am not used to creating romantic fics, so this is a bit out of my niche. I would love to make this much better, so any comments will be appreciated._

_Set after the events of Mass Effect 2, therefore there will be a significant amount of spoilers. It is my "in between" of ME 2 and what may/may not happen in ME3._

_Line breaks or asterisks separate scenes, lets hope they don't disappear._

Dawn Shepard awoke in her quarters dripping with sweat and tears. A young, petite woman of middle twenties, she had seen horrors beyond the most frightening nightmares. Her bright blue eyes no longer held that of joy. She knew pain, loss, and suffering, and her eyes, once a bright blue, were now a dull gray. Her auburn, shoulder length hair looked a mess from her restless sleep. "Another damn nightmare. I can't even get away from him in my sleep!" She screamed as she punched her thin wall. Feelings of complete hopelessness consumed her when she was alone, no matter the facade she kept up when in the presence of others. The one person who could fix her was the one person she never wanted to see again. She was better off without him, or so she thought. After all, she had defeated the Collectors and survived a jump through the Omega 4 Relay, which no one had ever done. She was had been revived from death after saving nearly her entire crew, only to be completely abandoned by those she trusted. She was fooling herself. Heroism would never be enough to fill the hole in her heart left by Kaidan Alenko. As much as Dawn hated to admit it, she missed him, but her crew was the most important thing to her now. Her job was to save humanity from the Reapers, even with minimal support from the Alliance and Council, and Cerberus after her. She knew her risks, and the likelihood of success, but since when did Commander Shepard, Savior of the Citadel, give up? Still, she knew she did, in fact need Kaidan Alenko, no matter what she told everyone else.

Sighing, she ran her fingers over the frame on her desk, the frame that still held his picture after all this time. Her warm memories were too soon interrupted by the voice of her AI.

"Commander, if I may, your emotional outbreaks are getting worse. Should I inform the doctor?" A blue hologram appeared near her mid air. If anyone had told Shepard an AI could have human qualities and develop emotional connections, she would have called them insane and requested they receive mental help. That was before EDI had been unshackled by Joker, saved them all from Collectors, and completely cut her ties to the company that created her in order to help Shepard.

"No thank you, EDI. I just need to vent some frustration." The Commander replied, exhaling deeply, turning to feed her hamster near her bathroom wall. The little rodent always brought a small smile to her face as he peaked from his small home. He had been a present for Joker and Garrus after her less than pleasant conversation on Horizon. In trying times, she was glad that at least a handful of her friends stood by her, backing her with their full support.

"Commander, I have received a signal. A ship has been attempting to track our sensors. It does not appear to be a Cerberus vessel." EDI said as Dawn jumped to her closet and removed a black uniform shirt bearing only an "N7" emblem. She had made a point to burn all of her Cerberus uniforms as soon as she told the Illusive Man to fuck off.

"EDI, instruct Joker to prepare for evasive maneuvers. I want Garrus, Tali, Grunt, Jack, Legion, Thane, Miranda, Jacob, and Samara to meet me in the CIC five minutes ago." She said rushing out the door, hesitating only to grab her smallest pistol. She then secured it to her thigh, and proceeded to her elevator.

As she stepped out the elevator, she was relieved to see both the turian and asari standing near her galaxy map. "We have an unknown ship tracking us. I want to know who they are if they're not Cerberus. Now!" She commanded as they parted. "Kelly, get the intercom running, I need to address the ship." She said to the young woman to her right as she stood near the galaxy map.

"Yes ma'am, already done." The yeoman said as she moved her hand so that the commander had access to the com button. The young redhead was apprehensive as she remembered her abduction by the collectors a week ago.

"This is Commander Shepard. After recent events, we were prepared for Cerberus to come after us. However, this is not the case this time. We have an unnamed vessel coming after us, and we need to be ready for anything. Perhaps this is nothing more than a mistaken lost ship, but I am not prepared to be caught with my pants down, again. Be battle ready until further notice! Shepard out." Shepard quickly closed the com channel, and made her way to the pilot wing. "Talk to me Joker." She said, looking at her longtime friend, a look of concern on her usually fair face.

"Commander, we're being hailed." Joker looked up at her waiting for instruction. Instances like this Shepard wondered why she didn't retire somewhere nice and quiet.

"Patch them trough, Joker" She said sternly, remaining completely composed, despite her internal worry.

"Aye, Aye, ma'am."

"This is Commander Shepard, identify yourself, and your ship." She said sternly into the com link, her uneasy hands gripping the pilot seat as she stood straight.

"Commander Shepard," A familiar voice came through on the com link. Shepard's stomach tightened and her throat instantly become dry. The strong-willed Commander lost her ability to speak upon hearing that voice. "Commander, do you read me?" The voice asked. Shepard cleared her throat. "Yes, I read you. You are traveling in an Alliance vessel by my readings. What are you doing tracking the Normandy-" She paused, taking in a staggered break, "-Alenko." She practically breathed his name, anger ceding into her voice. The link between the ships remained silent for what seemed like eternity before Commander Alenko finally poke up. "Looking for you Commander." Was the faint reply.

Dawn's throat caught. She was expecting a battle, or at the very least a heated confrontation. This was something she could handle, something she could prepare for through years of practice. She was a battle-hardened woman in her late twenties. She had lived, and died, and lived again. There was nothing that scared her, nothing she could not face. Nothing, except Kaidan Alenko. She ran her fingers over her forehead as Joker shook his head, and muted the channel. "Commander, you can't. It's not healthy for you." He said, the look of a concerned friend looking back at her, not that of her flight lieutenant. Shepard cleared her throat, and mustered up what she could. "Commander Alenko, you have permission to come aboard as soon as we land, and we will discuss a future agreement. We are five minutes to Illium, we will discuss this there. Shepard out." Joker slumped into his seat defeated. The woman had to be masochistic for talking to Alenko again after what he did to her.

Shepard quickly stumbled back to the CIC, oblivious to the quizzical looks from her crew. She stood at her galaxy map, pretending to work, but to no advail. "Commander Alenko requests to come aboard Commander Shepard. He appears to be alone." Yeoman Chambers shrugged innocently to her as she tapped away on her terminal. "Should I tell Joker to unlock the airlock?"

"Yes, Kelly. Please tell him to meet me in the debriefing room." Dawn said, hastening her pace toward the room, ignoring the look from her assistant. She paced the room nervously, sweat dripping from her head. The large room felt especially small to her at the moment. As she heard the doors slide open, her stomach tightened once again.

"Shepard?" His voice was low and quiet. "I know I am the last person in the galaxy you want to see, and I can understand why after what I said when we met on Horizon." He said, his face showing no signs of anger.

"What do you want, Kaidan?" She said, unable to hide the hurt and anger from her voice. "Frankly, I don't have anything more to say to you, but since you tracked me half way across the galaxy at the risk of me killing you, I suppose I can listen." She said, a bit forcefully as her biotics flared slightly, causing her entire body to glow a bright blue.

"Shepard, calm down. I have no intention of making an ass of myself again." He said, trying to diffuse the increasingly hostile situation. he had forgotten his, er, this woman had a temper on her. " I have a couple of things to say to you. I hope you will listen." He said, motioning to one of the seats. "May I?" He asked looking to her hopefully, his polite demeanor never changing. It agitated Shepard further, but she would play along, for now. She nodded her head reluctantly, causing her auburn hair to fall lightly over her face. With her permission, he slowly took a seat, watching her carefully, noting her biotic flare disappeared. She was off her guard. This was a good thing. "Shepard, I foremost wanted to apologize. I was out of line on Horizon, and Garrus was right. I wasn't thinking, and I was blinded by emotions. When I saw you alive my heart leaped with joy, but I was so angry with you. I was so in love with you Dawn. And I refused to believe you were gone for so long!" He said looking to her.

"Kaidan, you hurt me! You insulted me, called me a liar, and turned your back on me." She said through angry tears. Her biotics once again flaring. "You tell me you're sorry? Sorry for what? Are you trying to ease your guilty conscience?" She yelled as she lifted a chair and proceeded to throw in into a wall with a short mnemonic. She had developed a stronger temper since their last interaction. A fact that he felt was the cause of his stupidity. He noticed she had put a slight dent in the stone colored wall, though not damaging anything of importance. He hoped to keep it that way.

"Shepard, please!" Kaidan let his voice raise slightly as he put a hand lightly on her arm, unwavering to her anger. "I know I can't take back what I said, but I need to know everything you said was the truth." He said, looking defeated.

Dawn felt as if a lightning bolt shocked her entire body as he touched her, the glow receding slightly. "Kaidan, I have never, and would never lie to you. Why do you thing I am running? Cerberus is after me because I wouldn't work with them. I couldn't do the horrible things they wanted" She said, her voice becoming quieter despite her rising anger.

Kaidan was in complete shock. She was hurt, and she was still telling him the truth. At this point he felt lies were easier to take. At least then he could still blame her. He felt like the lowest point in the galaxy knowing what he know knew. He walked over to her, not caring if she were to hurt him right now, and kissed her passionately.

Dawn felt her body go completely limp at Kaidan's touch, she felt as if she had been stung by a seeker swarm. She knew how much his betrayal hurt her, how angry she was at him, and how much she still loved him. She was completely immobilized by his warm hands against her body. As they parted, she regained composure and her head cleared. "What the hell Kaidan!" She stammered, "How can you just show up here and expect me to forgive you! Do you have any idea what exactly I've been through!" She was afraid, and shoved a barrier between herself and the man standing in front of her.

"I…I'm sorry Shepard. I just…I couldn't…" His words faltered, and he stepped back from her, his dark honey eyes betraying his body yet again. He hadn't expected her to forgive him after his behavior on Horizon, but he had hoped she would. "I'm sorry I wasted your time Commander. I'll be going now. Good luck." He said as he walked out the debriefing door, out of her life for what may very well be forever.


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks to everyone who read and commented to me about chapter one. I'm very glad you enjoyed it. I hope you enjoy this chapter as well. I made some improvements to the chapter, and will continue to do so as I read on.  
_

_WARNING: sexual scenes and language_

Without thinking of protocol or protections, Dawn rushed out of the debriefing room, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. Her biotic barrier dropped in seconds. Despite the looks from her crew, she yelled out to him, "Kaidan! Stop." tears fell from her eyes, the bright blue returning slowly. "I...please...Not again. I can't let you..." She could remain on her own feet no longer, and began to collapse, only to be caught by Commander Alenko's biotic lift. Instinctively, Garrus drew his assault rifle and pointed it toward Kaidan.

"Put her down Alenko. I don't want to shoot you, but I will if you hurt her." Garrus growled, his sharp, battle trained eyes on Kaidan. He knew what the man had done, had said. Garrus had been by Shepard during their trip to Horizon. Why was Alenko here? What were this mans motives?

"Garrus, you know me." Kaidan growled as he slowly pulled Shepard to him, all the while maintaining his lift. "Why would I hurt her?" Garrus lowered his rifle ever so slightly.

"You've already hurt her more than anything else could, Alenko. Something I never thought you'd do." He said lowly, taking a bit of solace in the pained look on Kaidan's face as he said those words. He was wary of Kaidan's intentions, but he also knew taking the life of someone who was once his friend was pretty far down on the list of things he wanted to do. "Alenko, everyone knew what you two were two years ago. We knew then, we sure as hell know now!" Garrus practically spat at him. "She could have ran to any of us after what you said, but she didn't. Your photo still sits on her desk you prick!"

Kaidan faltered for a mere second, nearly loosing concentration on the field that held Shepard. He was shocked by the outburst from the turian. He had always known Garrus to be soft spoken, and anti-violence. Regaining his composure, but still hurting from Garrus' words, he strengthened the barrier around Dawn, hoping he wouldn't find a bullet hole in the process.

Dawn looked to Garrus, "Stand down Garrus. That's an order." She said firmly, watching the turian reluctantly place his rifle on his back and back off a few feet. She felt incredibly weak. She had not slept well, and she had exhausted her biotics with her angry display in the debriefing room. She felt Kaidan lower her to the ground, and she tried to stand straight. She faltered yet again, this time directly into his arms. She hadn't realized he drew her close with his lift. Things were left unsaid, things she couldn't talk about in front of her crew.

Kaidan felt her loosing strength in her feet, and picked her up carefully. "Let me help you, Shepard." The pitch in his voiced dropped so quietly she was sure only she could have heard him. Nodding placed her hands around his neck, and laid her head on his strong shoulders._'This is wrong on so many levels, but it feels so right.'_ She thought to herself as she allowed him to pick her up. She nuzzled herself into his chest, taking in his scent.

Despite her anger toward him, and the past two years of regret, anger and pain, Kaidan felt at peace with Shepard in his arms. He knew this could not, and would not last, but he was glad to feel human again for the first time since she had first kissed him. He smiled slightly before looking around the tense CIC. He had almost forgotten the dramatic display. "I am sorry to have caused trouble here. I expect those of you who know me, know the story, those that don't I apologize for putting you on edge." He said, walking closer to Garrus. "Garrus, I know after what I said back on Horizon, you have no reason to trust nor like me, but I promise I am here to make amends to Shepard. I see how fragile and short life is to become with the reapers advancing and I realized I need to swallow my pride and take advantage of what little time I have." He said, feeling as if he owed his once-friend an explanation. Garrus said nothing, but his expression softened ever so slightly. Kaidan would take whatever he could get, as he knew he was in no position to push anyone on a ship he knew he didn't belong. He looked to those who recognized him, and then to those who didn't. "A lot is to be said, but for now I just want to get her somewhere she can rest." He said defeatedly.

"Commander, her cabin is up the elevator. Should I arrange for Chakwas to visit?" EDI said as she appeared before him. "My name is EDI, I am the ship's virtual intelligence, and protector of my fellow crewmates." She said making Kaidan jump slightly. He looked to her in disbelief.

"EDI?" Kaidan asked, gawking at how personal this AI had become. He knew AI's were highly illegal, but now was not the time to mention such things. "Um, no, with everyone's permission, I'd like to stay with her. This is my fault, and I'd like to help. From Garrus' words, as much as I hate to hear them, it sounds like maybe I am the only one who can do so."

"You little bosh'tet. How do you expect usto just let you...after everything you did to her-" An angry Tali was interrupted by Garrus, "Tali, he's right." Garrus said as though it pained him to admit it. "Shepard loves this ass, and only he can help her. But there is something you must know Kaidan." Garrus said, taking a step toward the unconscious Shepard, "She hasn't slept for more than two or three hours a night since Horizon. She has nightmares of you, she mumbles your name every time she is unconscious, calls out for you when she thinks no one can hear her, she cannot function correctly without you. You have no idea what it's like to see your commanding officer curl up in a ball like a small child and cry." Garrus' voice grew to a whisper so that only Kaidan could hear him, "If you leave her, hurt her, or even piss her off, I will not hesitate to kill you. If you are going to leave do it now. I care for Shepard like she was my own family, hell she practically is."

Kaidan did not say a word. He feared for his life for a moment. These people were more than a crew to Shepard. They thought of her as family. He swallowed hard. He took in everything Garrus said, and although he believed the turian would not hesitate to kill him if Shepard were in question, he did now worry for he had no intention of ever leaving her side again. Though, he knew, she would not make it easy for him to stay, and he deserved everything she might and probably would say to him when she woke up. He nodded to the turian before walking toward the elevator.

Dawn awoke to see Kaidan asleep, his head next to her hand. She smiled. She knew she couldn't be angry with him right now. The time to talk about the past couple of years would come, but right now she was just glad to see him. Her head ached, and the fluorescent light caused her pain. She wondered how long she had slept, glad to have even slept at all. Her body felt week, but she attributed that to her previous dramatic display. She dreaded the explanation she owed her crew when she walked out of her room. She knew they would expect some answers, and many would want to know why there was an unwelcome visitor in her cabin. "Kaidan?" She asked softly, running her fingers through his black hair, careful to slowly wake him.

Kaidan thought he was dreaming as he awoke to her smiling at him. "You…You're not angry?" He asked her, his bright brown eyes had an astonished look to them. He wondered how he would proceed with a conversation. He knew tiptoeing aroung her might be best, for he certainly didn't want any bullet holes through him. He stood up slowly, and proceeded to give her a light, friendly hug. He knew they had to start somewhere, and hoped she didn't mind. For the first time in over two years, he awoke headache free. It seemed that only she could keep them at bay. "Kaidan," She sighed, a serious look forming on her face, "I am still very angry and hurt. I don't know if I can trust you right now, but I am willing to try." She sqid quietly, her voice breaking for a moment. He say still as she spoke, letting her be angry with him as he deserved. "I loved you Kaidan. When I was dying, all I could see was you. When I woke up to a new life, you were the first thing I thought about. I tried to find you, and when I saw you on Horizon, my heart fluttered once more" She said, starting to cry tears of hurt and anger once more. "And then you said those things, and I was so angry with you. I might have said more, felt more, but I had a job to do." She sighed, wiping away the tears.

Kaidan had expected much more anger and aggression on her part, but understood she had probably found other ways of dealing with them. Maybe through her fighting and destroying of the Collectors. He could not be sure. "Do you remember what I said to you the night before Illos?" He smiled to her as he sat on the edge of her bed. She nodded, "I could never forget that, Kaidan." She said, laying her head on his shoulder as she looped her arms through his. "I still mean that Shepard. You make me feel human, and only you. I haven't felt alive since the day you died… I've been an empty shell of a man. I tried to move on, God I tried, but I couldn't." He paused before taking in a deep breath, "I stared up at the stars for days wondering when your pod was going to come, and it never did. I haven't felt alive until today. Even when you nearly crashed a chair into my head, I would have loved it because it was you. I might have even deserved it." He said quietly, kissing her forehead. "Do you think I could lay next to you, Shepard?" He asked, hopeful. She smiled to him, "I thought you'd never ask." She said as she moved over, pulling to auburn hair into a pony tail. "Don't do that." He said softly, "I love your hair down." He said as he kissed her deeply, laying her softly down on the bed. She kissed him back after a few moments, her arms locked around his neck as she ran her fingers through his hair. She sighed as his kisses began to trail down her neck, causing her legs to tingle.

"Kaidan, I…we can't." She said quietly, fidgeting under his weight for a moment. He sat up and looked at her, "Why not Shepard, why can't we?" He asked her, no hint of anger in his voice. "We can't...just pick up where we left off. Like nothing ever happened...I...I can't loose you again. I..." She stopped, her words stuck in her throat. "Shepard. I have no intention of leaving you. I swear. Not even death can keep me from you this time. I was stupid before. I know that in the blink of an eye the Reapers can wipe it all away. I promise I will be here no matter what comes Dawn." He said, kissing her again, this time lightly. Her pale pink lips tasted like the sweetest thing he ever tasted. He had missed her. "I promise to talk about this soon, maybe even later, but can't we have just a few moments for us? I want something to go right again, Shepard. I still love you."

Dawn believed him despite all her resolution, she knew she shouldn't. She kissed him once more, slowly moving her hips so that they angled his own. She let her hands wonder his body, feeling every inch. Kaidan sighed as she did so, each touch sending a jolt through his body. He caressed her smooth skin, exploring her every curve as his kisses trailed down her body. As he made his way back up her, she pulled him up to kiss him passionately. Dawn moaned lightly as he pulled her closely against him. She positioned herself and rolled on top of him, kissing him fiercely. She paused to breathe and Kaidan slowly removed her shirt, exposing her bare skin. She was even more beautiful than he remembered. She had some new scars from her "revival" but it made him love her all the more. He slowly caressed her breasts, making her gasp slightly. She arched her back as he kissed every inch of her body once more, causing her to moan lightly.

She called his name repeatedly, taking in his every touch as his fingers grazed her body. He ached for her body against his, but kept his grasp on sanity. "I want this to last Shepard." He said, his voice deepening as she grasped him tightly. She smiled at him with her captivating eyes as she began fiddling with the buckle on his pants. She felt a pain through her as she remembered the last time they were together this way, and for a brief second it showed. Kaidan smiled at her knowingly and kissed her tenderly. Within a matter of minutes the kisses deepened, each furiously exploring the other's body. A mismatched mile of clothes lay forgotten as the two intertwined their bodies, loving one another as only they could.

Shepard rolled off of him breathing heavily. She looked up at him, blushing as she did so. "Kaidan, are we moving too fast?" She asked, positioning her head on his toned chest, still looking upward at him. He ran his strong fingers through her silken hair. "Can I tell you something, Shepard?" He asked her genuinely as she nodded her head slowly. "You were only the second woman I've ever been intimate with." He said, a pale pink burning his cheeks. "Her name was Emily, and we dated only a month before we become intimate." He said, his eyebrow twitching. "We were together less than two months. Apparently I wasn't enough for her. After our first, and only night intimate, she left me." Kaidan sighed. "After that, I figured my career didn't have time for personal anything. I never loved her, but I did care for her. I was upset when she left me, but not heartbroken. I was assigned to a few other ships, and time went on." He said, sitting up in her bed and looking away.

She put a hand on his arm, causing him to turn around and smile at her. "Then I was assigned to the Normandy and everything was different. From the moment I laid eyes on you, I was completely captivated Shepard. I knew it was unprofessional, and could possibly get us both discharged so i didn't say anything, but that afternoon Udina grounded us at the Citadel I knew I had to comfort you somehow." Kaidan moved closer to her and held her in his arms. "I was so pissed when Joker interrupted that. I was going to kiss you and he knew it, so he stopped us. Part of me hates him for it, part of me is grateful." Dawn smiled to him, "Well, he can't call me to the bridge this time, now can he?" She winked to him as she kissed him again. "Bunk here tonight. With me...again." She asked, her doe eyes hopeful.

Kaidan smiled playfully. "Is that an order, ma'am?" He grinned at her, knowing that she didn't officially outrank him anymore. She situated herself, and snuggled closely to him, her eyes becoming heavy. Sleep crept upon her, soon overpowering her conscious. She fell asleep peacefully, held by the one man who could make everything feel alright again, even if it wasn't.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thanks to those who have read this far. I appreciate it. I promise there is a furthering of plotline somewhere in the future. I just got caught up in being a hopeless romantic. xD_

_As always, BioWare owns the Mass Effect universe._

Kaidan opened his eyes, careful not to wake the sleeping redhead next to him. He sighed inwardly to himself. He was good at complicating everything. He was worried about what the future might hold. He could slip out of here right now, and never see her again. Maybe then he could spare them both the heartbreak of destruction and death. He knew that rebuilding their trust would take precious time and work; Work that should be used trying to fight the Reapers. He sighed, knowing that he could never abandon her again. He hated himself for even thinking it. Reapers or no Reapers, this had to be done. If they worked things out, they might just be better focused and driven for the cause ahead. His mind drifted to a conversation years ago "Battlefield flirting is one thing Shepard, but there are regulations against fraternization…" He had told her as he stood in her office on the old Normandy. This time there were no regulations as she was no longer Alliance, just a Spectre. But was he ready to go public with their love this time?

"You alright?" Dawn asked, pulling him from his thoughts. He hadn't even realized she's woken up. "You look bothered by something Kaidan." She said, concern becoming apparent in her face. As she placed her small hand gently on his, he smiled. "I'm fine, just thinking about different things. And hey, you were right, Joker didn't need you on the bridge this time." He joked, remembering how their last time ended. Shepard giggled, remembering the same night. "No, but I'm sure he does now." She said with a smirk. She sighed, her face becoming serious, "People are going to talk, Kaidan. Are you ready to answer them, or are we to keep this between the two of us?" She asked him as she dressed in a black N7 dress shirt and slacks. She was no longer Alliance, no longer Cerberus, but dammit she still was Commander Shepard of the Normandy and she would dress as such.

Kaidan looked to her, smiling at her ruefully. "We will see when the time comes Shepard. Professionalism still has to be apparent, no matter what we choose." He said seriously, as he began to re-dress himself in his Alliance class A's. "Shepard, I'd like to stay aboard your ship. I don't care if it's as an assistant or something. I really did miss the Normandy...and you.I've already requested a transfer." He said, hoping he hadn't overstepped his boundaries.

Shepard squealed like a child at Christmas as she jumped into his arms. "Commander Alenko, I took the liberty of informing the crew that you would be needing an N7 uniform as well." EDI said from her projection in Shepard's room. "They will be found next to Commander Shepard's."

"Thank you EDI, please inform Yeoman Chambers I will need to address the crew on Commander Alenko's permanent place on the Normandy. Note that I have officially accepted his posting, but I regret to inform him I already have a very competent assistant, but I still need an XO." She commented as she looked his way. "I accept ma'am." He saluted her with a grin on his face. She knew here was being nothing more than a smartass. Shepard rolled her eyes and turned back to the hologram that was EDI. "Also, please forward the request to Councilor Anderson if Commander Alenko has not already done so." Shepard said, smiling as she handed Kaidan his own uniform which mirrored hers. "Ready to face the crew?" She asked, laughing uncomfortably as he dressed in the N7 uniform and looked to Dawn. She drew in a sharp breath. He looked good.

As they stepped off the elevator they were met by Garrus. He eyes Kaidan's choice of clothing with annoyance. "So you're permanent, I take it." Garrus asked him, no look of amusement to be had on his scarred face. "Remember what I said Alenko." He said, continuing to his post within the main battery. Shepard watched him walk away, wondering about his sudden erratic behavior. She shook her head and made her way to address her crew.

"Attention crew of the Normandy, this is Commander Shepard. I am here to tell you that I am fine after my illness yesterday. Alliance Staff Commander Alenko has been assigned to the Normandy. He is our new XO, and I expect you will treat him with the same respect you treat each other. This being said, there are to be a few new changes around here, everyone is to be wearing their new black and red N7 uniforms. We will no longer dress as members of Cerberus, as we are now their enemy. Though we receive full support and financial backing from the Council and the Alliance, we are not with them either. We stand alone here." Dawn stopped, letting the information sink in to each of her crew. "I will not hold anyone responsible should they choose to leave now." She said over the com link. "I will take resignations up until the end of the day. Thank you all for your loyalty and support. Shepard out." She said confidently, turning back to see Joker standing in front of her. "What? Just like that we have to trust the guy who stabbed us in the back?" He said, inches from her face. She smiled, Joker was the only person willing to stand up to her, to tell her she was wrong. "Joker, I am not saying you have to trust him, but yes, we will be working together so I suggest you play nicely." She looking to Kaidan and began again, "Both of you." She looked around, "Aye, Aye ma'am" They both said wearily. She lloked around to notice many if the crew had already returned to their posts, wearing the new Normandy uniform. She felt proud to have such an honorable and trustworthy crew.

"Ma'am, if I may?" Kelly asked her hopefully as she stood before Shepard. "Of course Kelly, your opinion holds a great deal of weight." She smiled to the girl and invited her to continue. "We are all proud to serve you ma'am, and no one on this ship is resigning. We worked for you all along, not Cerberus, Commander. Although, if I might be so bold ma'am, in my psychological expertise, you and Commander Alenko are not hiding your attraction to one another very well." The Yeoman paused, waiting for an angry reaction. Once recieving none, she continued, "That and about a quarter of your crew saw you both leaving your cabin cheerfully m'a'am." She said sheepishly. "Carry on, Chambers." Shepard said sharply, blushing once more and activating her com link.

"As we are currently docked, I need to see every member of this ship on the CIC." She said over the com channel. Before she let go of the button, her entire CIC room began to fill with her crew, not one wore a black and white uniform any longer. She smiled proudly as she eyed her crew, even Jack chose to don the uniform, with her own modifications, of course. "I will not lie to you all." She began as the last of her crew appeared on the CIC. "Many of you may die, many of your families may die, but I promise you this. I promise to do my damndest to see you all home! The Reapers think they know how to destroy us. The think they will win. But no one has ever been as strong as we are now. We are backed by every race in the galaxy. Everyone is counting on us to win." She said, seeing the faces of each and every crew member, embedding them into her mind. "I have lost some good friends, but I have gained many more. I'm sure the rest of you can say the same. It is up to us to make sure they have not died in vain. We will never be closer to anyone as we are to one another." She smiled, walking into the crowd that was her crew. "Now, you all are dismissed for three days of R&R here on Illium. Please remember you are a symbol of the Normandy as you go have your fun. If anyone does not have questions-" She looked to see Donnelly raise a hand. "Yes Donnelly?" She hoped his question would make sense to her, as their previous conversations were filled with tech talk she barely grasped.

"Commander." He began in his accent, "Is it true that you and Commander Alenko are together again? No one saw him leave your quarters last night." He asked her. Shepard was shocked, news traveled fast on her ship. She cleared her throat as she tried to hide her embarrassment, wondering what to say as the expectant looks of her crew bore into her. "Donnelly," She began as a voice interrupted her. "Donnelly, not that it is exactly your business." Kaidan said sharply before softening his expression. "If you must know, I care about the Commander on more than a professional level, and while then there we regulations against fraternization-"

"-That you broke." Joker coughed loudly, earning some snickers from some of the crew, and a stern glare from Shepard.

Kaidan continued, glaring at Joker"Now I am free to say that I am seeing Commander Shepard." Kaidan said in a matter of fact tone, smiling to Shepard. Dawn gripped the railing and smiled as the cheers of her crew filled the air. "Hey Commander does this mean you are going to actually eat again?" Gabby said to her as she saluted her commanding officer, stiffing a laugh. Dawn Shepard straightened and made her way back in front of her crew of misfits. In their short time together they had become more of a family of sorts than just a crew. They genuinely cared for one another. "You are the brightest group of misfits I have had the privilege of commanding. However, now that you've all had your gossip for the year, go have some fun. Crew Dismissed!" She said, watching her crew jump toward the airlock.

"I cannot believe you said that, Kaidan. I thought you wanted to keep it under the table." She said as she fumbled with paperwork, keeping her eyes low on the desk in front of her. Now that she directly reported to no one, she kept the logs for a source of information. She hoped that her crew would come back a little less stressed and a little more determined. The weeks ahead were going to be very difficult, and she needed everyone on their game. That, and after nearly getting blown up, they deserved a little time to themselves. "Shepard, er, Dawn, look at me." He said, placing a firm hand on her cheek. She didn't want to look at him. She had never been one for public displays of affection, and Kaidan just created one of the largest ones possible."I love you." He said as he pulled her to her feet and held her to him. "This time I don't care who knows it. I know you don't lie to your crew, and I can see every single one of the genuinely care for you. Plus, do you really think they wouldn't have noticed that I will keep coming out of your cabin?" He smirked. "I honestly think we can be professional and still love each other." He said confidently. "Speaking of professionalism, I'd like to check out the specs of the ship if that would be possible ma'am." Kaidan said, snapping to attention. "Permission granted Commander. Dismissed." Shepard said, dropping her salute. "Thank you ma'am. I'm off to check the systems on the ship. After that we should go get a drink." He said as he winked at her and walked off.

Dawn had entertained the new idea of a professional relationship coupled with a private one a few times. She had never expected one could flow easily, yet she too decided it was well worth the try. She neatly filed away the papers at her desk before standing up silently. She needed to check her terminal, and now seemed like an excellent time to do so. As she walked into the CIC, she saw a light blinking on her terminal. She had at least one message that needed attention. She logged in and saw one from Anderson, and one from Wrex. She decided to read the one from Anderson first, hopefully he wouldn't be too mad with them.

_Shepard,_

_I just received your transfer request. As you are no longer an Alliance officer, we had to do go about this differently. At the request of Commander Alenko, we have transferred him to your ship using your status as a Spectre. He will still be required to report back to the Alliance as an officer. We also wish to inform you that you will be reinstated as an Alliance officer should you choose to be. We received conformation from Alenko that you in fact never worked with or for Cerberus, but you merely used their resources. We still frown upon that, but you are welcome back at any time. _

_-Anderson_

_On and on an informal note, I am glad to see you and Alenko working together again. Congratulations._

Dawn smiled to herself, she was glad to have someone like Anderson on her side, even it was informally and from afar. She would think seriously about his offer, but for now, she liked the way things were with her crew. Now was time to read her message from Wrex.

_Shepard,_

_I find myself in need of your assistance my friend. Things are getting troubling here on Tchaunka. I heard of your victory against the Collectors from Urdnot Grunt. I knew you wouldn't die Shepard. You're much to hard headed for that. He also informed me that Alenko was back with you. I hope you know what you are doing Shepard. _

_Please come to Tchaunka when you can._

_-Wrex_

So Wrex needed her help as well. She would make it a top priority to get to his home planet as soon as the crew was off leave. She knew that she needed all the help she could get, and helping an old friend felt like a good thing to do despite the fact. She closed the terminal and walked out of the airlock. It was time for Commander Shepard to let her hair down and be Dawn Shepard, even for one night.


	4. Chapter 4

Dawn awoke with a start. An inexplicable amount of pain filled her left arm. She looked to the source to see Kaidan's firm grip on her. She winced as she moved slightly. Looking over she saw him, doubled over heaving, sweat pouring from his face as he gripped his head. "Kaidan?" She whispered as she dimmed the light across the room. Kaidan screamed in pain as she tried to move him slightly. She knew his migraines were bad, but she had never witnessed one. She quickly released his grip from her and made her way to the other side of her bed. Ignoring the pain in her own arm, she helped him up. "We need to get you to the medical bay." She said. He could only grunt in response as she helped him up, his eyes watering from the pain he was in.

The elevator seemed to take forever as she looked at Kaidan's strained face, her own arm searing with a hot pain. She noticed the marks on her wrist began to bruise and shrugged it off. Whatever pain she felt were nothing compared to his. As they reached the CIC, the elevator opened and Garrus stood near its entrance, looking shocked. "Don't just stand there. Help me!" She said through gritted teeth as Garrus lifted Kaidan's other arm over his shoulders and helped drag him into the med bay. "Doctor." Shepard said, looking to a bleary-eyed Chakwas, "Extreme migraine. He woke up throwing up and screaming in pain. Can you please give him something to dull it or at least knock him out until it's over?" Shepard said, her voice strained. Her face paled as she leaned onto the bed they placed Kaidan on.

After administering some pain relief to him, Chakwas turned to Shepard. "Commander, you don't look so good. Can I also take a look at you as well?" She asked, concerned for her commanding officer. "My wrist. The pain is getting unbearable." Dawn said extending her left arm to the kind faced doctor. "Commander, I believe Commander Alenko broke your wrist." She said, her voice becoming low.

"HE DID WHAT!" Garrus demanded, reaching for his gun. "I TOLD THAT BASTARD IF HE HURT YOU-" Garrus stopped as he noticed Shepard was pointing a gun at him. "Garrus he was in extreme pain and wasn't thinking. Much like I am right now. Put it away. Now!" She demanded as Chakwas set her wrist in place, causing her to yelp in pain. "I hope you know what you're doing, Shepard." Garrus grumbled as he started toward the door. "I will always protect you, my friend." He said as he walked out with a sigh.

"Commander I suggest you both take a while to recover and relax. I have set your wrist and I will cast it after some medi-gel, but it will take a bit to heal." Chakwas said to her in a motherly tone. "I will try to find something to alleviate Commander Alenko's headaches, but it is merely a side effect of him being an L2." She said, shaking her head. Shepard nodded, still feeling queasy from the pain as she walked toward the door. "When he wakes up, tell him to come to bed, please." Shepard said wearily. She was tired, both emotionally and physically. She took one final look backwards at Chakwas before walking out the door. Pain be damned, she was still worried.

"Commander, are you alright?" Yeoman Kelly Chambers asked, genuine concern in her voice. Damn her. Did the girl ever sleep? Shepard smiled, "I am fine Kelly. Just a few scrapes. It comes with the territory of being me." She smirked, her eyes betraying her false bravado. "How are you holding up, Chambers. You've been through one hell of an ordeal." She asked her Yeoman, trying to change the subject. "I am slowly coping and getting back to my old, perky self, Commander." She said, thanking Shepard with a smile. Shepard nodded and dismissed her, heading for the elevator that lead to her cabin. She was thoroughly exhausted.

"Shepard?" Dawn stirred as she heard Kaidan's voice near her bed. She turned and sat upright. He looked tired, but still just as handsome as ever standing in the doorway. "How are you feeling?" She asked, placing her injured arm on her pillow so as to elevate it. Kaidan winced as she did so, knowing he was the obvious cause of her pain. "Dawn, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have….I didn't mean-" He stopped as Dawn smiled at him lovingly. "Kaidan you were in more pain than I was. I just needed to alleviate your pain, and didn't even think twice about my own. My wrist will heal." She said, patting his previous spot on her, rather _their_, bed.

As he took a seat, she moved closer to him, kissing his shoulder softly. "We need to find a way to deal with these headaches, Kaidan. I can't let you help in any fight until we do. They're getting worse." She said, matter-of-factly. He shook his head, "Shepard, this is the first headache I've has since I found you. The only reason I had it is because I dreamt of your death again. Garrus forwarded me your official death report. The suit malfunction, your suffocation, the pain, all of it." He said, his voice cracking. Dawn's biotics flared, sparking in the dimly lit room. "Don't be mad at him, he said, noticing her biotic flare. "He did it to prove a point. He wanted to make sure I understood that you never lied about anything on Horizon, that I understood the pain you were in." He said beginning to stroke her hair. He soothed her, offering her a sip of the water he brought up with him. She smiled, and gladly accepted having woken up with cotton mouth.

She slung her legs over and touched the floor with her bare feet, shuddering slightly as she did so. The floor was a bit cold, but her body quickly adjusted. She stood up to check her terminal for any messages concerning a new assignment. Kaidan's breath caught as she did so. She was wearing one of his t-shirts, he smiled inwardly at the loving notion. She had no idea how beautiful she was to him. The dim lighting accentuating her features captivated him. '_Close your mouth, Alenko.'_, his brain shouted to him. He watched her walk, sashaying her hips. She was much thinner than he would have liked to admit, the obvious strain of recent events had taken its toll on her health. He knew in time he would help to fix that, so he worried little. She smiled at him from her terminal. Dawn sighed at the sight of no new messages. The crew would be back in tomorrow, and they would be reporting back to the Citadel, at the mercy of the Alliance and Council. She hoped to be reinstated, but feared for what it might do to her relationship with Kiadan. She decided now would be an appropriate time to discuss it.

"Kaidan, I'd like to be reinstated." She blurted out. He was completely taken aback. "I want to be an Alliance soldier again. I have to. It's who I am." She said sadly as she walked to him. "I know, Shepard. I want you to be happy." He sighed. "I'd rather have you than my commission though. I just don't know how to do this. I'm thinking of taking a demotion and letting you command the Normandy." She said quickly, hoping he wouldn't cause too much of a fuss. She was very, very wrong. His biotics sparked slightly, "Dawn Marie!" He exclaimed. "You will do no such thing! This is your ship, your people. Do you honestly think any of them would even think about obeying my orders!" He yelled, a bit louder than necessary. She knew that he was right, but she couldn't bear another separation. "We will talk about it when we speak to Anderson. Okay?" Kaidan said firmly, a distant smile on his face. She could only nod. "What will we do on our last day of shore leave?" She asked him, her icy blue doe eyes burning into his every being. Kaidan could barely keep sanity when she looked at him like that. "I can think of a few things to occupy the day." He said suggestively into her ear causing her biotics to spark. She smirked as she moved over to the bed, lying down invitingly. They would not be leaving the cabin today at all.

Dawn smiled as she awoke to Kaidan kissing her check softly. "Good morning, beautiful." He said sweetly into her ear. She turned over to kiss him lightly on the lips. She groaned, remembering the crew would be back any moment. "We should." He kissed her once more. "Get going." She said kissing him back. "Crew. Remember?" She said in between kissed. He sighed, knowing she was right. They both dressed quickly and walked to the elevator. Dawn looked to see a grin on his face. She shook her head. Men were amused at the silliest of things.

As the elevator opened, she looked to see her entire crew standing around the elevator, straight faced. She knew something was going on, though she wondered what could have gone wrong. Everyone seemed accounted for. She sighed, she hated bad news. Unbeknownst to her, Kaidan looked at Joker and winked. Kaidan turned to Dawn and sighed, blushing as he did so. "Are you okay?" She asked him quizzically. He nodded to her as her crew, Joker included took a step closer to her. '_What is he doing out of the pilot seat. He never leaves it.' _She thought to herself. She looked back to Kaidan. "Dawn Marie Shepard," He paused, kneeling to the ground. Shepard's eyes became moist, and her pulse quickened. This was the very last thing she expected from him. "Will you marry me?" He asked, opening up a box holding a simple diamond ring. She began to cry. Kaidan wondered for a brief moment if he had done this wrong as she had yet to answer him. She looked around at her crew. All their eyes upon her expectantly. Moments passed feeling like hours to Kaidan. He began sweating a bit.

"Yes!" She nodded and kissed him deeply as cheers erupted throughout the CIC. "About damn time!" Joker yelled through the cheers, only to receive a half-hearted glare from Shepard. She was happy, even if only for a moment, everything was going right. She knew it couldn't last, but she had a few moments of happiness. They embraced each other for a few minutes before Dawn broke their closeness. "Jeff Moreau, you are officially dead. I can't believe you kept this from your commanding officer and friend!" She yelled in mock anger. "Hey, it's only fair!" He retorted, limping back to the pilot's chair. "To the Citadel right ma'am?" He asked her, bringing her thoughts back to earth.

She nodded solemnly. "Yes, I suppose so." She said as the crowd dispersed, making their way to their respected stations. "How are we going to sneak this by Anderson and the Alliance?" She asked him, worry creeping into her face as she walked to her galaxy map, running her hand over the cool metal bars as she did so. Kaidan looked at her thoughtfully for a moment. "Easy." He said, claping his hands together. "Either they accept it, or I join you as a civilian." He said in a tone stating she was not allowed to argue. She bit her lip. She didn't want him to resign, but if one of them took a demotion, it was imminent.

"We're two minutes out Commander Shepard." She heard Joker's voice over the com. Time to face the music whether she liked it or not. As they docked she tried to compose herself, her newfound ring on her finger. "Garrus, please accompany me and Alenko." She asked, taking a deep breath as they entered the airlock, the turian dutifully following on her heels. She quicken the pace to Councilor Anderson's office, not pausing to be invited in.

Shepard walked up to Anderson with a sharp salute, Alenko mimicking her. "At ease, Shepard, Alenko." Anderson said sharply. "I understand you'd like to be reinstated Shepard." Anderson said as more of a statement than a question. She nodded. "Well, I will see to it we are able to do so. It will take some time to process your orders. Commander Alenko, you will be asked to return to your ship." He said, looking to him, nodding. "Actually, with all due respect, Councilor." Shepard smirked at his response, remembering something Ashley Williams had said two years before. _'Why is it when someone said 'With all due respect' what they really mean is kiss my ass' _she had said to Udina. She looked to Kiadan, shaking her head lightly. He ignored her pleas and looked back to Anderson. "I will have to decline. I would like to remain on the Normandy as a Commander." Kaidan said, his eyes growing stern. "If you deny this request I will have no choice but to resign my commission." He said with a sad sigh.

After a long, uncomfortable silence Anderson spoke once more. "You are both good leaders, Alenko. You wouldn't leave the Alliance for anything." He said, eyeing him suspiciously. "There is more to this. Off the record, I'd like to know whats up, son." He said in a fatherly tone. "We have been through a lot together, I am asking more as a friend." He said, breaking his stone-like stance. Kaidan too broke his stance and relzed. "Off the record, sir, I am going to marry Shepard. I know that we can function professionally together and she would just as soon risk my life as any other member of her squad, sir." He stopped, searching Anderson's face. Seeing no change in demeanor, he continued. "Sir, as this is off the record, I must admit that I tracked down Commander Shepard, and when I requested my transfer to her, we were already romantically involved-ish. In fact, we have had a personal relationship since before we defeated Saren." Kaidan flinched as Anderson opened his mouth to speak. He was afraid of the consequences he had just brought down upon them.


	5. Chapter 5

"You understand the severity of this situation, the both of you." Anderson barked, sending chills up Shepard's spine. "You could both be court-martialed for this." He said, placing a hand on his temple. Kiadan knew they would have to have faced this sooner or later, though he never expected to hear his former commanding officer yell quite so sharply. Anderson had always been a soft spoken man, never needing to raise his voice to get his point across. "However," Anderson began once more, lines becoming apparent on his ageing face, "This was off the record. Officially, I heard nothing. Commander Alenko, as a Councilor and spokesman for the Alliance, I grant your request to remain on the Normandy. However, I must stress the importance of remaining professional when the threat of the galaxy is at stake." He smiled fatherly at the pair lines creasing his dark skin. Kaidan let out a long sigh as Anderson looked to the ring on Shepard's finger. As Anderson shook his head at the pair, he let a knowing smile appear on his lips. He suspected this would be result of the two finding comfort in one another. They balanced one another out delicately. Thinking this was enough chatter, he stood straight. "Dismissed." Anderson barked as they exchanged salutes. There would be time for friendly banter later.

As they walked out the door, Shepard turned on Kaidan, a look of anger in her eyes, "What in the hell were you thinking Alenko!" She hissed, her face turning bright crimson, anger apparent in not only her tone but her bodily movement. "You could have gotten us thrown in jail!" She said crossly, thumbing the ring on her finger. Her expression softened, and she looked around to make sure there were no other people in the hallway. She leaned over and gave Kaidan a quick kiss. "I'm glad you did it though. Let's get back to the ship. We have work to do." She said, walking back in the direction of the Docking Bay, taking her renewed military career in as she did so. Though they were not clear for lift off until her paperwork went through, she could still get a few things done around the Normandy, like informing her crew they were about to join the Alliance.

As Shepard, Kaidan, and Garrus entered the Normandy airlock, the sound of two familiar voices arguing filled the walkway. "You obviously could care less, you bosh'tet!" Tali yelled, throwing her hands into the hair, her omni tool glowing as if she had just been using it. Choosing to let Tali work it out, Shepard pulled Kaidan toward the elevator. She needed to get some work done, and think through some things before they departed from the Citadel, and she was not up for a chat, even among those she considered friends. There was still something weighing heavily on her, and adding more to that would do more harm than good.

_I wanted to have one scene for just Shepard and Kaidan. The song "Superman" by Five For Fighting popped onto my ipod while I was typing followed by "I'll be" by Edwin McCain, "All The Lonely People" by The Beatles, and "How To Save a Life" by The Fray, so this is more of a sweet, sad, sentimental scene. You may skip it as it has nothing to do with plotline in all actuality, just a bit of sadness, and fluff._

Shepard walked over and sat near the edge of their bed, a distant look on her face. "Kaidan, why is the weight of the galaxy on my shoulders. No one understands, not really." She said sadly. "I wish I could cry, just fall down and cry. I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask to be a hero!" She cried as he sat next to her, putting a comforting arm on her defeated shoulders. "I'm not crazy, but sometimes I desperately feel it." She said, lying her head on his shoulders as he ran his fingers through her silky smooth auburn hair.

"Dawn, I know that this is unfair. You're only one woman, and everyone expects you to be made of steel, but I know how human you really are. You're more than just a pretty face, and unfortunately, everyone knows that. Everyone expects you to save us." He said, feeling as if there were no words to truly pacify her. Finding no other words, he merely continued to stroke her hair. He had so many things to say, but could not find the right words.

"Kaidan, it's not easy to be me." She said, tears filling her blue eyes as a faint blue aura extended from her hands. "I died, and yet everyone in the galaxy moved on." She said, staring out the window, the lights of the Citadel illuminating the walkways. She stood and leaned onto the window that she recently had installed. "Even you went on normally without me." Her whisper barely audible as her hand slid softly down the glass, finally letting the long kept tears fall. She stood silently, letting all her hurt and anguish fall for the first time since stepping off the Lazarus Station. "Why must everyone control me as if I were a machine! I'm not a god damn Reaper, I'm only human!" She finally yelled more to herself than him, slamming her fist on the glass.

Kaidan stepped toward her, his heart breaking as he genuinely felt her pain. He knew biotics felt emotions of others occasionally, but never once had he felt anything so strong. "Dawn, I lost a friend, and so much more the day you died. Somewhere along the bitterness I felt after you died, I lost a lot more than my sanity. Had I thought for even a moment I could have saved your life, taken your place, I would have done so." He said, tears filling his own eyes for the first time since her death. He pulled her close as he thought of her. "Tell me we belong together, Dawn. I'm captivated by the words that flow from your lips. I promise to be a better man, be the greatest man of your life if you will let me." He said, not thinking of the words spilling from his mouth. He felt it was time to fully speak with his heart. He pulled her to sit back down. As much as his words sounded like a cheesy romance novel , it was truly what his heart felt.

"Kaidan, not many would be sitting her after my emotional outbreaks. When I scream, you fight away all of my fears." She smiled weakly as she kissed him lightly on the lips. "I don't think this is fair to you, though. You deserve what little of a normal life you can have." She said, biting her lip as she thought of the life they could have together. "I want a life with you, but when everyone expects me to be this idealistic hero, I cannot give it to you." She said, wiping the tears from her eyes to no avail.

As he kissed her tenderly, nothing but pure adoration and love apparent in his movements, he looked deep into her eyes. "Dawn Marie Shepard, there is no woman but you for me. I already told you I will always be your crying shoulder, my love." He said, holding her close as she cried, his own emotions trying to come to terms with feeling hers. Dawn finally composed herself, and after kissing Kaidan, she moved toward her desk. There was work to be done.

Dawn looked at the schematic of a Reaper that Joker passed to her after the destruction of the Collector Base. "There has to be a weak point to them." She muttered quietly. Kaidan looked at her from across the room. "Maybe if we can find a way to get Harbinger to take over something, then destroy it. You know, like we did with Soverign?" He asked, a quizzical look on his face. Dawn shood her head, her hair covering her eyes. She quickly brushed it to the side before holding up the data pad. "See when Harbinger took control of the collectors I thought the same, but he's a lot more powerful than Sovereign was." She paused for a moment, tapping a pencil to her forehead. "I think he might be their leader, so to speak." She said to him standing up. "Let's get down to the CIC. It's time we get off the Citadel. I need to speak with Liara, being the new Shadow Broker, she will have massive resources." With that statement, she walked to the elevator, Alenko on her heels.

"Joker." Dawn barked as she exited the elevator, Kaidan still dutifully on her heels as he handed her the datapad. Joker signed, and rolled his eyes. "I take it honeymoon is over." Joker said. "Oh well, back to business." The helmsman said walking toward the cockpit. After taking a seat he looked back to Shepard. "Where to, Shepard? Shall we go blow up another base? Do something else to piss off Timmy Boy?" He said sardonically, receiving a glare from Shepard as a result. "Get us to Illium, smartass." She commanded, turning on her heels. "Aye, Aye ma'am." Was his reply as she walked to the galaxy map. "Alenko, assemble my team in the debriefing room in ten minutes. We have some more things to discuss en route to Illium." She said, turning to Kelly, eyeing him as he walked off. "Kelly, eyes off my property." She smirked as she caught her yeoman stealing a glimpse of Kaidan as he made his way to the elevator. The young yeoman blushed a deep scarlet, unable to speak. "It's okay Chambers. At ease. Please forward EDI's findings to the projectors in the debriefing room so that I can share them with my team." She said, smiling as she walked to the room to prepare.

Dawn sighed as she turned the datapad on, synced it with her omni-tool and awaited the rest of her closest colleagues to take a seat. Joker was the last to sit in. Giving EDI full control of his baby was hard for him, but Shepard needed everyone she trusted together, so here he sat. "Everyone, I have here a datapad collected by Joker after our destruction of the Collector Base." She said as she displayed the image in the center of the room on a hologram." We have very little time to find a weakness." She took in a deep sigh. "We have very little time to find something, anything to work with." She said, passing copies of the diagram to each member's omni tool. Each took a solemn look at their diagram, even Joker offered no humor to ease the thick tension in the room. Shepard forced a smile as she eyed her crew.

"Everyone, please take a few hours and look at this datapad carefully. I will call another meeting and we will discuss any and all findings as well as any theories you can come up with." She said, dismissing her crew as EDI projected herself into the room. "Commander, Coucilor Anderson requests permission to come aboard." The AI chirped as Dawn smiled. "Of course, EDI. Let him in, I will meet him at the air lock." She said wearily as she walked out of the room.

Everyone on her crew looked anxious, and most had reason to be. Most were marching into uncharted territory after being a Cerberus operative turned Alliance military. "Captain on deck!" Donnelly shouted as Shepard and Anderson walked into the CIC. Every member of Shepard's crew saluted him, and he returned the gesture of respect willingly. Dawn sighed, sensing the Councilor's need to speak with her, so she directed him to her quarters. "I welcome you to the new Normandy, but I would like to know what you're doing here, sir." She asked professionally. With her reinstatement into the Alliance he was once again her commanding officer. Ne nodded and put a hand firmly on her desk. "I wanted to see your ship before giving your crew some valuable news, Commander. Also, I am here both officially, and unofficially. This is the unofficial part, Shepard." He said, rubbing his forehead stiffly. "How are you going to do this?" He asked, taking a deep breath. Dawn smirked dully and offered him a seat as she took a seat on the floor and looked up to him. "Honestly, I have no idea. Most of my past success has been without planning. This time, I'm not sure it will work. I am going to fully rely on all of my team to help me unite the galaxy." She said, offering him a drink as she sipped hers out of a small glass beside her.

Anderson happily took the glass, and nodded. "Well, I must say you have the right team. I observed them for the little time I was in their presence, and they seem very loyal to you. If anyone can do this, it's you Shepard. I have always had faith in you." He halfway smiled as he finished his drink, and gently set the glass down. "I'd like to address your crew, Commander. Don't worry, I know about the AI. Let's pretend I don't, shall we?" He winked as she breathed a sigh of relief. When the fate of the galaxy was at stake, top brass seemed to overlook a lot for her. She smiled weakly as she spoke up.

"EDI, assemble the nonessential personnel into the CIC, and open the com link so everyone can hear." She said taking a step into the elevator. Neither spoke as the elevator descended for what seemed like hours. As the elevator stopped, Shepard stepped out to see her crew standing at attention, ready for whatever Anderson had to say. She stood next to the Councilor and awaited his briefing.

"Crew of the SSV Normandy SR-2, for those of you who don't know me very well, I am Captain Anderson of the Alliance, and Councilor for the Human Embassy. I would like to welcome you all into the Alliance. You will all be given new uniforms and tags before you depart from the Citadel. I understand that Commander Shepard has taken great strides to keep you all in your places, and due to the nature of our galaxy at the moment, the Alliance has chosen to overlook your ties to Cerberus as you have seemingly all cut them. Please be aware, we will still be watching each of you as a precaution." Anderson took a breath and looked around the room. Each crewmember remained composed and respectful, awaiting his continued speech. He nodded, and obliged. "Per Alliance regulations, each ship must have only one officer bearing the rank of Commander, and here stand two."

Dawn winced slightly, breaking her firm composure, she knew this would eventually happen, but hoped she would lose her rank, and not Kiadan. She waited for Anderson to continue. "Now, be that as it may, I am hereby proud to promote Commander Dawn Shepard to Captain of the SSV Normandy. Congratulations Shepard." He smiled, noting that each crew member tried to remain stone faced. Shepard and Alenko were practically beaming with pride, though neither would admit it, which amused him inside. "I will leave you all to congratulate your Captain." He turned to Shepard, "Shepard, I expect a list of your main team members, including your new XO by morning, understood?"

Dawn withheld the grin that formed beneath her straight face as she saluted Anderson. "Yes sir!" She replied as he saluted in return and made his way to the airlock. She sighed and turned back to her crew with a beaming grin of pride as the CIC erupted into a mass hysteria of yells and whistles.


	6. Chapter 6

_Thanks for being loyal readers. I'm sorry for the shortness if this chapter in advance. I am trying to get some real action into this fluffy piece of work somehow xD_

_Reviews are awesome, because I like to know what you want to to put in this story ^_^_

_Sadly, BioWare ows all, I just like to play with their toys._

"So how does it feel, _Captain_?" Donnelly asked in his thick irish accent as he pat her on the back and grinned. Shepard's mind was trying to get a good grasp on what had just happened. She was grinning like an idiot, much like the first time she and Kaidan almost kissed back on the SR-1. Only when Kaidan approached her did she snap out of her thought. She jumped into his arms and smiled.

"I told you Anderson and Hackett would find a way, Shepard." He said lightly, smoothing her wispy hair. Inwardly, he was happy for Shepard to be reenlisted, knowing that it would solve a lot of his inner turmoil. He also felt that it might add some being that they were once again in the same position as before: Duty before love. Kaidan admired that she had such a strong drive to be a soldier first, but he also knew that if it came down to life or death, he would not lose her again. He would fight with this indefinitely.

"Alenko?" Shepard asked, puzzled at his facial expression as he was deep in thought. She could tell something was wrong with him by his tightening grip on her waist. "Alenko, snap out of it soldier." She said snapping her fingers in his face. He quickly shook off the thought and looked at Shepard. "Sorry, just thinking about something." He muttered sheepishly, releasing his hold on her so that she could move freely about the CIC.

Shepard chose to take note of his behavior and make a point to discuss it at a later date. For now, she had things to do, and people to chat with. She nodded to Kaidan before proceeding to mix herself within her crew, shaking hands and smiling. Tali approached her and hugged her tighly, "Now you really are my captain!" She exclaimed brightly. Shepard put a hand on Tali's shoulder. "Tali, it's only because of you and the rest of my crew that I am even alive to accept the promotion, my friend." She smiled heartily to the quarian. Even through her helmet, Shepard could make note of a proud expression on the quarian woman's face. She had been very lucky thus far in finding only the most loyal to call her friends and crewmates. She looked at her omni-tool and decided to let her crew have the last couple of days as an extended shore leave as the repairs on the Normandy were complete and paperwork finalized.

"Excuse me everyone." Shepard commanded loudly, as the room quickly quieted. "We have about three days until we are fully cleared to leave what with the repairs finishing up and paperwork being finalized." She said, turning her head to face her entire crew in whole. "Now, Commaner Alenko has a few announcements for you all." She said, motioning for Kaidan to take a stand. He wearily obliged.

"Everyone, as members of the alliance, you will all be required to wear the standard uniform, as well as some form of armor into any conflict you take part in." He said sternly, eyeing Jack and Miranda in particular. Both women acted as if they were about to say something, but quickly thought better of it catching the Commander's stern look. "As per alliance regulations, there is to be no fraternization among crew mates." Sniggers erupted within the group as Kaidan's face blushed a deep crimson. He cleared his throat. "However, due to Captain Shepard's er, informal view of you, I am willing to overlook such things as long as it does not interfere with your duties." He said, remembering a conversation he held with Shepard aboard the SR-1. The entire room erupted into giggles. "Like you and the Captain will do such." A snarky Joker scoffed, eyeing Alenko directly. Kaidan glared at Joker, "As a matter of fact, Joker." He said threateningly as he walked over to the helmsman. "We're getting married before we leave, and I'd like you to be my best man." He said, his demeanor changing instantly to that of a friend, not a commander. Joker's flinch instantly became a goofy grin.

"Wait, does Shepard even know about this?" He asked incredulously, looking for the redhead through the crowd. "Apparently I do now." She said, walking up to Joker, smiling genuinely. "I will need a couple of bridesmaids, and a maid of honor." She said grabbing Tali's hand and dubbing her the maid of honor. "Miranda?" Shepard asked, eyeing the woman hopefully.

Miranda looked Shepard over carefully. "Oh please, Shepard. You bloody well know I would be honored." She smiled a heartfelt smile that shocked the crew. '_So, the ice queen was capable of feeling, who knew?' _Joker thought carefully, looking to Miranda.

"So it's settled. A quick ceremony before we take off this week." Shepard said, her pearl white teeth gleaming under the light in the CIC. Shepard felt a twinge of guilt as she made her way to her private terminal. She inwardly wondered what gave her cause to seek out happiness of this level when they were about to be immersed in a full-scale galactic war. Her fingers practically flew to her holopad as she looked up various shops on the Citadel. She quickly compiled a quick list of places she would need to visit today, as well as people she would have to quickly invite.

Kaidan felt a knot deep in his stomach. Shepard actually agreed to be joined with him in every way possible, knowing they might as well kiss their careers goodbye when Alliance brass found out. Of course, they would probably be in attendance if the media got wind of such a union taking place. He knew he didn't want his career to end in a dishonorable discharge and courts martial, but the thought of the Reapers ending all sentient life in the galaxy before Kiadan had a chance to give Shepard a proper love didn't sit well in his gut. So he would marry her, but he wasn't looking forward to telling his mother. Kaidan swallowed hard as he began to compose a letter and invitation to his mother, including all the details he possibly could disclose before reluctantly hitting the send key. He would await her reply nervously, but he knew conversations with Joker and Garrus were in order.

"Separd, I can't believe how gorgeous you look." Miranda commented as she filled out the train behind Dawn's wedding gown. She looked positively aglow with delight. Dawn, on the other hand, scowled.

"I can't believe you talked me into this dress!" She hissed, feeling completely risqué with the strapless, lowcut gown. Each part of the fabric hugged her curvy figure before flowing out at her knees. She could not, would not, believe the beautiful woman in the mirror was indeed herself. Her hair was pinned neatly atop her head while ringlets curls framed her delicate face. Dark eyeliner enhanced the color of her piercing blue eyes; her lips finished off the look with a pale pink gloss. Dawn felt like a princess in her newly discovered attire. "Miranda, thank you for picking out my gown." She said warmly to the dark haired vixen dressed in a snugly fitted navy blue dress.

"Any time, Shepard. Now, let's get Councilor Anderson in here. It's time you went down that isle." Miranda smiled, as Tali placed an affectionate hand on Dawn's arm, leading her toward the door. Anderson stood in the doorway, handsomely dressed in sharply pressed Alliance Class A dress. "You look beautiful, Dawn." He said, kissing her lightly on the cheek. Shepard was a bit taken aback, Anderson only used her first name on very rare occasions. She was touched that he even asked to walk her down the aisle, confiding that he saw her as the daughter he never had. She smiled to Anderson, thankful to have him as a father-figure. "Well, I am as ready as I will ever be." She said, placing her arm through Andersons as the two stepped through the door, toward her short future.

Kaidan fumbled with the bottom of his Class A jacket nervously. He had never been one for formal ceremonies, yet here he was marrying the woman he deeply loved, breaking all the rules to do so. He turned his head slowly as music began to play throughout the room. The small crowd turned their heads, as Anderson led a beautiful woman down the aisle toward him. His breath caught as he took in her beauty, allowing it to form a picture in his mind. She was his forever, however short that "forever" might be. As she reached him, her eyes sparkled with tears, emotions mirroring his own. Any doubts as to whether the two were doing the right thing fled from his mind instantly as they began to recite their vows.

As Kiadan kissed Dawn, he recalled his previous statement two years ago as he stood before her in her quarters on the SR-1 _"you make me feel human" _he had told her right before he kissed her for the first time. The feelings he had for her filled him as no other feeling ever could. She was eternally his, no long Commander Shepard, but Captain Dawn Alenko. He smiled as he held her hand, walking together as one through the doors she had recently escorted through. They had time for a small celebration before coming to terms with what they had just taken part in.

"It's going to take a lot of adjusting." Joker mused as he looked to Dawn. "I can't call you Commander or Shepard anymore." He said, somewhat sadly. "And dammit, I have two Alenko's to deal with now." He joked, slapping his hand down on Kaidan's shoulder. The party had just begun as far as Joker was concerned, he was going to live up this night because he might not live to see another.

After revising paperwork, rectifying name changes upon official Alliance documents, and hastily explaining their actions to Hackett and Anderson, both of whom seemed mildly amused at the pair, the SSV Normandy SR-2 was cleared for takeoff, officially as an Alliance vessel once more. Tomorrow, the screw would set out with one goal in mind: Unite as many colonies and planets as possible, and spread the word no matter how much fear it caused. It was up to the small crew to unite an entire galaxy, but if it could be done Dawn Shepard-Alenko could do it.

_**{{NOTE: **Next chapter will not be very fluffy, I need a bit of a break from fluff. I promise to add some, but it will not be the main point within__**}}**_


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